Diana Renee Baker
After corresponding with Diana on and off for several years I finally got to meet her in person at a gathering in Las Vegas. Along with Donna Kelli we shared a room for the weekend and got to know each other much better. I asked her if she would be willing to share her story and experiences on my blog and she agreed.
I first recall dressing in my cousin’s and aunt’s clothes when I would visit them at the early age of 9. Although I found this picture of me at the age of 4 years old in my mom’s old photo album and as you can see I am wearing my cousins dress and sandals and pushing baby buggy. I couldn't believe the feeling that I got when dressing. I really felt like a girl. That is as far back as I can remember. I think what really got my interest in dressing was when I played house with my cousin, with whom I was very close. She was like a sister to me. I would visit her in San Diego, CA, during the summer. On warm nights my aunt would let me sleep on her patio. Late at night, usually around midnight, I would sneak out to the laundry room and put on my cousin’s bathing suit and cap and walk around the block. I did that many times. I was probably around 11 years old at the time. So I guess you could say that was the very first time I was out in public. Kind of!
I had a very tough time when, at the age of 15, my mother found out what I was doing and said that if I didn’t stop dressing she was going to take me to a therapist. Being that young and scared, I chose to stop; however, I still had fantasies of dressing as a girl. Of course, those feelings never did go away. I couldn’t get rid of those feelings because they are a part of my life and soul I guess. When I reached the age of 18, I feared there was truly something wrong with me. Was I crazy? What was wrong with me? I really didn’t know anything about this and there really weren’t any books to read at the time - around 1966. Cross-dressing was still a very secret practice. I chose to go to a doctor at the age of 18. I told him how I felt and he really didn’t know how to answer. The doctor just said, “You are a natural red-blooded American boy.” I thought to myself – what? I wasn’t satisfied with his answer, but just left it at that and didn’t dress for 10 years, until I got married. And really, when I got married, I didn’t know I was a transgender person.
This whole thing was tucked back in my sub-conscious mind. Honestly, it was and it didn’t surface until one day when my wife was out of town. I had noticed a pair of panty-hose in the waste basket, so I decided to try them on. That was when the wall of my sub-conscious came crashing down. After that episode, I started dressing in my wife’s clothes whenever she was gone. Unfortunately, we were not the same size, so in wearing her clothes, I caused a rip here and there. It put alot of stress on me. My wife tried to cope with that for a while, until she got very angry and I feared she was going to leave me. Consequently, I stopped cross-dressing, only to start it all over again. This continued for a long time, but I was always careful. Later, my wife found out that I was dressing again. She expected me to suppress my feelings, so I tried and tried, but I didn't know very much about cross-dressing and the urge to cross-dress. At the time, there wasn't the Internet from which to get information, so I would go to book stores and try to read up as much as possible. Society still was not tolerant then. I had to hide all of my feelings. I suppressed my feelings as long as I could. When I could no longer suppress my feelings, I started dressing again, until she found out again. We talked and my wife tried to accept it this time. She told me that if I wanted to cross-dress, I should do it, but not feel guilty about it. So when I “dressed” I told her, however, she again expressed that she just couldn't deal with it. She then told me that when I cross-dress, she didn’t want to know about it. That was many years ago. To this date, we have never again discussed my cross-dressing.
I have long admired Diana Renee’s looks, style and confidence in public. She loves to listen to live music and frequently will go out enfemm to listen to bands play. I’ve heard her relay some of her interesting experiences in those environments and she wrote a few of them down for me.
1.One night I ended going out by myself one night July of 2014. I had a nice dinner at a local restaurant and then I decided to go to the Hilton where I usually go and it was very crowded that night there wasn’t hardly seat available and these young ladies invited me to sit at their table. I thanked them allowing me to sit with them and started talking and ended up dancing them all night. I had a wonderful time that evening and I had once told them I was a transgender woman and they never asked and from what I could sense , they thought I was a genetic woman.
2. Again I went out by myself and went to the Hilton and was sitting myself and a oriental gal came and asked if she could sit at my table because wasn’t any seats available. We started talking and we ended up on the dance floor and she then said we should go to this other place in San Jose where that she knows fairly well that have a lot men that like to dance. I told her I wasn’t interested in going anywhere else and she then asked me for my phone number and wanted to get together in the future. I told her I don’t give my phone number out but would more than happy to see her here at the Hilton in the future. Some guy ended up asking her to dance and she went off with him.
3. One night I was sitting by myself at this club and this group of gals asked me if I would mind taking a picture of them all. I then started talking with them and then ended up dancing with them all and then they ended up inviting me to sit with them. A few of the gals said they loved the dress I was wearing and asked where I bought it. I told her I get a lot of dresses as Ross Stores. We all were talking about the different stores we went to and gosh we was having a lot of girl talk about different bras and dresses. I had a wonderful evening with them all.
Diana and Donna Kelli and I had a great time together in Vegas and there was much talk about meeting again. I look forward to many more adventures and am sure I’ll get to hang out with Diana Rene Baker again.
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